Meet Dr. Pamela Gurly
I AM NOT STEREOTYPE: I AM H.E.R. ~ Washington DC
Describe Yourself (Mentally & Spiritually):
I am a conscious and intentional thinker; and live, walk, and breathe in faith. I am extremely analytical because I need to know that the decisions, I make are made with purpose and with the intent of a specific outcome (and sometimes more than one). My energy speaks to the decisions I make (even regarding relationships). My past has taught me lessons that could have been avoided if I "tuned in" to my energy instead of questioning them. Having faith lets me know that no matter what decision I make, I will prevail. Why? Because I truly believe HE never takes you where HIS grace will not protect you. ALWAYS covered!
Tell Us Briefly About Your Career As An Author:
I have only recently realized that being author comes in many forms. So, while I consider myself a recent author because I have written "books" and still writing books; being an author actually dates much further back than I can recall an exact timeline for. I was a writer of poetry that was published in books when I was a teenager, and I have published a dissertation, training curriculum, and many online blogs and business articles for at least 15 years (geez, that really puts my age into perspective).
I Am Not A Stereotype: I AM H.E.R.
Type Of Book:
Memoir, Inspirational, and Motivational
What Is Your Book About?
My book is about how I grew up socialized by the world to have a need for belongingness; and it came at the expense of ridicule, criticism, & losing who I was. No matter how you are raised, when you step out into the world (even as a child) your perception can change how you see yourself. This change broke me. I lived my life mentally toxic living up to other people’s standards of whom I needed to be. I had to STOP IT! I had to change the narrative & stop believing in the stereotyping of whom I was taught to believe I should be. I had to heal, get real, forgive, and learn to sit on my pedestal to holistically see the world differently and accept my place in this world does not have to be like anyone else's. This healing and growth allow no judgment to change who I am.
What Led You To Write This Book?
I really felt as if my experience was not out there. I wanted to evoke tough, but necessary discussions that would heal and allow people to be open to be themselves. I wanted conversations to be had about self-love and what is really looks like. I wanted people to go beyond hiding their past hurts because of judgement and ridicule. Most of all, it was important to me to let the world know you cannot, should not, and will no longer stereotype black woman because society cast false judgements to make excuses for themselves. There needs to be a shift in the narrative.
What Makes This Book Unique Where People Will Want To Pick It Up & Read?
My book is unique because it was written to be introspective; yet conversational. Through my transparency, thoughts, and perspectives, it is an honest look at the world we live in and how it defines black girls and black women.
Favorite Character In The Book & Why:
Me (of course). Because I overcame, healed, and grew tremendously when it came to finding who I was and falling in love with who I am today.
Best Memory Concerning The Book While Writing:
My childhood. Being able to go back and remember moments with my two sisters and my mom was special. It also reaffirms the closeness I have with them.
Worst Memory Concerning The Book While Writing:
Reliving the terrible decisions I made in my life not listening to my gut and ignoring every red flag thrown at my feet. While it was healing, it also made me realize it is by God's grace that I am still alive today.
How Do You Make Time For Yourself & Manage To Keep Yourself A Priority?
Self-care is important to me. I have to be real honest with myself about what I am able to achieve and not achieve. Sometimes this means I have say "no" and stand by it. I make sure at least a few days a month are dedicated for things "I" enjoy doing (whether alone or with family). There is no compromise with that either. I find it important to not lose who I am by ignoring the things I love to do.
I also have a color-coded calendar that helps me ensure I make time for me (I date myself), my family, and friends (I love a good happy hour or girl's trip).
Tell Us A Song, A Scripture, A Motivational Video And/Or Person That Keeps You Motivated Lately. Why?
Wow, this is hard. Having a millionaire mindset means my motivation does not come from one source, it comes from many. I am very complex like that. My family is my main source of motivation. Other than that, I am motivated by books, not music and there are several scriptures that keep me walking in my faith (Philippians 4:13, Psalm 37:4, and Proverbs 16:3).
What Advice Would You Like To Share With The World?
It is completely okay to be broken, insecure, flawed, and hurt. It is not okay to treat others wrong because of it. In order to change the narrative in our culture you need to take an introspective look at yourself, heal, and suspend judgement towards others. We need one another to be great!
My book can be purchased at https://www.iamdrpgurley.com/iamnotastereotypeiamher and on e-book at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and Apple ibooks.
Follow Dr. Gurley on FB at IAmDrPGurley
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